Nice thing at the supermarket today...I was standing at the checkout...looking around...and what did I see??? A really retarded Chav (auf deutsch - assi) with a bellybag, silver chain around his neck, shaved head...aaaaaand a sweater which had written "RESEARCH" above the chest;)
Research in what? Anatomy of bitches? Advanced head-shaving? Social exclusion of bellybag-wearers?
Friday, February 19, 2010
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Sackgeld in der Schluckstube versaufen...
So, heute mal was lustiges fuer alle die deutsch sprechen (sorry my illiterate english friends, but this wont be funny for you ;)
Ich bin ja gerade in Basel, wegen Wissenschaftskram. Und es wurden mal wieder alle lustigen Klischees ueber die Schweizer bestaetigt, naja, zumindest ueber deren Sprache...
Ganz gross ist z.B. dass Taschengeld hier Sackgeld genannt wird, wie man schoen an dem Zeitungsausschnitt hier sehen kann (dummes Kind, btw. vielleicht kriegt er ja n bisschen Voodoo geschenkt)
Der Hit war dann den ganzen Abend in Kombi dazu der Name von ner Kneipe, die Schluckstube (Schluggstube geschrieben, irgendwie haben die hier die Rechtschreibreform verpasst)!
"Wir gehen unser Sackgeld in der Schluckstube versaufen"...die Schweizer fanden das am anfang nicht soooo witzig...dann schon...koennte allerdings auch daran liegen, dass ich es 10mal wiederholt habe...
Naechste lustige Zeitungsmeldung: 25jaehrige Baselerin an der Poledance SM in Hamburg...Jetzt fragt ihr euch sicher alle "Was, n Tabledanceladen wo man auch noch geschlagen wird und schlagen darf??? Wo ist der???"...
Weit gefehlt, SM steht hier fuer Schweizer Meisterschaften (etwas komisch, ja...). Allerdings heisst das auch, dass wir uns Schweizerinnen an Stangen angucken koennen...Hamburg scheint wohl das Poledance Eldorado zu sein.
Was gabs sonst noch? Das Hotel hatte kein Internet, man konnte n Analogmodem nutzen...nicht cool!!!
Das Fruehstuck war extrem lactose-intolerant-unfreundlich (Kaese, Kaese, Kaese, Kaese, Joghurt). Aber das Essen war sonst sehr gut, lecker Kaesefondue und gutes Bier ;)
Samstag konnten wir in nem Cafe draussen am Rhein sitzen...in Hamburg waren -9Grad hier 7 und Sonne ;)
In 2,3h gehts zurueck ins eisige Hamburg...brrr....
Monday, January 18, 2010
italian music
Do you know the feeling if you are at an italian place, being completely annoyed be the fucked up italian music? Then suddenly you are completely happy because you know and like one of the songs, just to realize a second later that you just like the SCOOTER-remake?
No?
k...than I must be a weird guy...
No?
k...than I must be a weird guy...
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Happy new ... whatever
Uuuuhhh...we got us a new decade...
Quite some stuff happened in the last one, I really wonder if the new will also bring so many new, interesting things.
Plans so far:
- getting some collaborations with SwissModel (going to Basel in two weeks)
- going to the Bahamas for holiday and meeting the sailors ;)
- going to Trondheim (Silke will be working there)
I think everyone realised by now, that I have nothing interesting to say, just drivelling...
So, let's close this new decades first post...
More blabla by the time something important happens...
Quite some stuff happened in the last one, I really wonder if the new will also bring so many new, interesting things.
Plans so far:
- getting some collaborations with SwissModel (going to Basel in two weeks)
- going to the Bahamas for holiday and meeting the sailors ;)
- going to Trondheim (Silke will be working there)
I think everyone realised by now, that I have nothing interesting to say, just drivelling...
So, let's close this new decades first post...
More blabla by the time something important happens...
Sunday, December 13, 2009
Fuck.Brussels!
Got a little game for you today:
Imagine visiting the proposed capital of glorious Europe...wouldn't you expect a bunch if openminded, nice, helpful and friendly and to some extent clean-ish people?
I bet you would...
Now do the same though-experiment again, but change the bigger part of the citys inhabitants to idiots whose first language is gay French...
And yeah, there goes being openminded, nice, friendly and helpful...
No one speaks any English, people will just run into you on the street if you don't jump out of their way fast enough, oh, and some of them will get really angry and offended if you try to ask something nicely in English..
For example, the guy at the metrostation who is supposed to sell you tickets, because their fucking ticket machines never work, got really pissed off, when we did not understand his French mumbling...the retard did not get that holding two fingers up meant "we want two of your precious tickets!"... I think even cavemen would get that...
Some other nice fact about ticket machines...imagine a main train station in a big capital where the only way to pay for your train tickets at night is some indigenous bank card...no credit card, EC, maestro nothing...oh and imagine a pile of shit lying next to this machine...
E voilà! Welcome to Brussels!
Okay, there were also a few positive things:
- very good fries and fried meatballs
- awesome chocolate
- good electro music and a nice lightshow at the evening on grand places Xmas market (ever seen a church light up with electrotunes before?)
And everyone at the airport was nice and friendly, however I took some closer looks at their name tags...and none their names sounded French...all very flamish!
Let me end my few paragraphs of hate with this:
PEOPLE OF FLANDERN!
Get rid of Wallonia! Just give it to France ;) And ban French by law! Then you are welcome to host the European capital ;)
EDIT: Ha, the wallonian Steward was the same from my flight into Brussels, he rembered me and talked to me during the flight...
Maybe some if them are nice and friendly...hard to find, though ;)
Imagine visiting the proposed capital of glorious Europe...wouldn't you expect a bunch if openminded, nice, helpful and friendly and to some extent clean-ish people?
I bet you would...
Now do the same though-experiment again, but change the bigger part of the citys inhabitants to idiots whose first language is gay French...
And yeah, there goes being openminded, nice, friendly and helpful...
No one speaks any English, people will just run into you on the street if you don't jump out of their way fast enough, oh, and some of them will get really angry and offended if you try to ask something nicely in English..
For example, the guy at the metrostation who is supposed to sell you tickets, because their fucking ticket machines never work, got really pissed off, when we did not understand his French mumbling...the retard did not get that holding two fingers up meant "we want two of your precious tickets!"... I think even cavemen would get that...
Some other nice fact about ticket machines...imagine a main train station in a big capital where the only way to pay for your train tickets at night is some indigenous bank card...no credit card, EC, maestro nothing...oh and imagine a pile of shit lying next to this machine...
E voilà! Welcome to Brussels!
Okay, there were also a few positive things:
- very good fries and fried meatballs
- awesome chocolate
- good electro music and a nice lightshow at the evening on grand places Xmas market (ever seen a church light up with electrotunes before?)
And everyone at the airport was nice and friendly, however I took some closer looks at their name tags...and none their names sounded French...all very flamish!
Let me end my few paragraphs of hate with this:
PEOPLE OF FLANDERN!
Get rid of Wallonia! Just give it to France ;) And ban French by law! Then you are welcome to host the European capital ;)
EDIT: Ha, the wallonian Steward was the same from my flight into Brussels, he rembered me and talked to me during the flight...
Maybe some if them are nice and friendly...hard to find, though ;)
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
TV HaCkS0R
YEAH!
Our new bedroom TV arrived yesterday...did some stupid browsing about how to change the channels...and what did I find???
There are ways to make this TV being able to play all kinds of movies via USB, usually only the €250 more expensive one is able to do that...
However, there is a a secret menu, where you can tell my TV that it is that more expensive one...now it thinks exactly that and plays fucking DIVX movies ;)
Tomorrow I will hack 127.0.0.1!!!!
Our new bedroom TV arrived yesterday...did some stupid browsing about how to change the channels...and what did I find???
There are ways to make this TV being able to play all kinds of movies via USB, usually only the €250 more expensive one is able to do that...
However, there is a a secret menu, where you can tell my TV that it is that more expensive one...now it thinks exactly that and plays fucking DIVX movies ;)
Tomorrow I will hack 127.0.0.1!!!!
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Cambridge_fun
ah...the predoc course (basic bioinformatics, thanks ;) is over....so I had a nice day of shopping and meeting people tonight...
Got some Blu-Rays, Games and Books, all cheaper than in germany, yay!
About tonight, we went for food to a nice tapas place, had a 50% off voucher...and had a feast for 14pounds each ;)
Welcome to britain, I like ye still ;)
Later that night we went to michelle for drinks and than my cultural programm started...we went to "the fountain" presumably the pub with the most amount of retard unemployed townspeople in cambridge...wasn't that fancy at first...but then ine guy started harrasing the girl who were with us (one of them being one year younger than my dad...didnt have to feel old, yeah!) touching them on their asses, there might also have been some tit-grabbing...
After some time, joe told the doorman who showed the guy his way out...but it didnt stop there...that dude didnt know when it was over...so they had to pin him to the ground and later call the police, who in the end, arrested him...
so, congrats joe...you cant grow a moustache, but you can get someone arrested like magnum p.i. ;)
okay...to much strong cider...off to bed now, tomorrow back to the girlfriend, looking soooo much forward to it!!!
Got some Blu-Rays, Games and Books, all cheaper than in germany, yay!
About tonight, we went for food to a nice tapas place, had a 50% off voucher...and had a feast for 14pounds each ;)
Welcome to britain, I like ye still ;)
Later that night we went to michelle for drinks and than my cultural programm started...we went to "the fountain" presumably the pub with the most amount of retard unemployed townspeople in cambridge...wasn't that fancy at first...but then ine guy started harrasing the girl who were with us (one of them being one year younger than my dad...didnt have to feel old, yeah!) touching them on their asses, there might also have been some tit-grabbing...
After some time, joe told the doorman who showed the guy his way out...but it didnt stop there...that dude didnt know when it was over...so they had to pin him to the ground and later call the police, who in the end, arrested him...
so, congrats joe...you cant grow a moustache, but you can get someone arrested like magnum p.i. ;)
okay...to much strong cider...off to bed now, tomorrow back to the girlfriend, looking soooo much forward to it!!!
Wednesday, November 04, 2009
...warum geht Karstadt nur pleite...?
J.J. Abrams STAR TREK ist ja endlich auf BLU-Ray raus...und da Timmy den natuerlich dringend braucht, dachte ich mir, ich tue dem Karstadt um die Ecke mal was gutes und kaufe den da (soll angeblich der gleiche Preis wie bei Amazon sein).
Also ab zu Karstadt, runter in die (sehr kleine) Multimediaabteilung und gesucht...nix gefunden...Angestellte fragen..."Moin, ich such den neuen STAR TREK auf Blu-ray"
1. Antwort (Armer kleiner Junge, der an der Kasse steht):
"Hier steht er!"
- ...das is ne DVD...
"Oh, dann fragen sie mal meinen Kollegen da hinten."
2. Antwort (Dicker, schwitzender Mann, von da hinten):
"Den gibts nicht auf BLU-Ray!"
- ...Aeh, doch, bei Amazon, Media Markt, usw. -
"Ne, ich habe im System nachgeguckt, glauben sie mir, das sind nur DVDs."
- ...(irritiert, warum der Mann keinen Plan hat)...Ne ne...das sind BLU-Rays...
"(angepisst, unfreundlich) NEIN, BEI UNS GIBTS DEN NICHT!"
- ...(am Weggehen, aber hoerbar)...die Kollegen von Quelle rufen Sie schon...
...okay, okay...wenn man Leute einstellt, die keine Ahnung von ihrer Abteilung haben, dann wundert einen die pleite auch nix mehr...
Und ich mag es ja ganz besonders, wenn "Verkaeufer" mir weissmachen wollen ich haette keine Ahnung...
Ach ja, der nette Herr wird bald genauso wie diverse Quelle-Mitarbeiter von den ersten schwarz-gelben Steuerverguenstigungen profitieren...
- DER ZAHLT NAEMLICH BALD KEINE LOHNSTEUER MEHR!!!
...alles Idioten...so, amazon.de...STAR TREK...bestellen...aber da kaufe ich gleich noch was...fuck your local dealer!
Also ab zu Karstadt, runter in die (sehr kleine) Multimediaabteilung und gesucht...nix gefunden...Angestellte fragen..."Moin, ich such den neuen STAR TREK auf Blu-ray"
1. Antwort (Armer kleiner Junge, der an der Kasse steht):
"Hier steht er!"
- ...das is ne DVD...
"Oh, dann fragen sie mal meinen Kollegen da hinten."
2. Antwort (Dicker, schwitzender Mann, von da hinten):
"Den gibts nicht auf BLU-Ray!"
- ...Aeh, doch, bei Amazon, Media Markt, usw. -
"Ne, ich habe im System nachgeguckt, glauben sie mir, das sind nur DVDs."
- ...(irritiert, warum der Mann keinen Plan hat)...Ne ne...das sind BLU-Rays...
"(angepisst, unfreundlich) NEIN, BEI UNS GIBTS DEN NICHT!"
- ...(am Weggehen, aber hoerbar)...die Kollegen von Quelle rufen Sie schon...
...okay, okay...wenn man Leute einstellt, die keine Ahnung von ihrer Abteilung haben, dann wundert einen die pleite auch nix mehr...
Und ich mag es ja ganz besonders, wenn "Verkaeufer" mir weissmachen wollen ich haette keine Ahnung...
Ach ja, der nette Herr wird bald genauso wie diverse Quelle-Mitarbeiter von den ersten schwarz-gelben Steuerverguenstigungen profitieren...
- DER ZAHLT NAEMLICH BALD KEINE LOHNSTEUER MEHR!!!
...alles Idioten...so, amazon.de...STAR TREK...bestellen...aber da kaufe ich gleich noch was...fuck your local dealer!
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Muse concert - guests
Just arrived on my seat at the muse concert...I know...sitting at concerts is gay...but fucking convenient...
However, the lady right next to us has white hair and looks like she is around 60...
...so...are we here on the wrong date or is she???
EDIT: awesome concert!!!
But...the old lady has been there with her son, and seemingly, the son was forced to go there with her, she new every fucking song and was singing along ;)
I want be like her by the time I am 60 (well, not an old lady...)
However, the lady right next to us has white hair and looks like she is around 60...
...so...are we here on the wrong date or is she???
EDIT: awesome concert!!!
But...the old lady has been there with her son, and seemingly, the son was forced to go there with her, she new every fucking song and was singing along ;)
I want be like her by the time I am 60 (well, not an old lady...)
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Assiumschlagbahnhof
...Berliner Tor...U2 um drei Sekunden verpasst...um einen rum stehen nur Schlampen und Assis...dann eine Idee...
Leicht angesoffen stell ich mich an den Kiosk an...vor mir kaufen die Leute Schnapps und Bier...was auch sonst...
Ihr hättet allerdings mal das Gesicht von dem Verkäufer sehen sollen, als ich ihn dann nach ner Tageszeitung von Sonntag gefragt habe...
Leider war es dafür noch etwas zu frueh...also mit'm iPhone rumspielen und dumme Blogeintraege schreiben ;)
Leicht angesoffen stell ich mich an den Kiosk an...vor mir kaufen die Leute Schnapps und Bier...was auch sonst...
Ihr hättet allerdings mal das Gesicht von dem Verkäufer sehen sollen, als ich ihn dann nach ner Tageszeitung von Sonntag gefragt habe...
Leider war es dafür noch etwas zu frueh...also mit'm iPhone rumspielen und dumme Blogeintraege schreiben ;)
Saturday, October 24, 2009
...just to make you jealous...
We booked our holiday for March/April next year.
Destination: New York City and the Bahamas (Grand Bahama island to be precise).
...and hopefully we will meet Jan and Klaas who are sailing around half of the world currently ;)
Destination: New York City and the Bahamas (Grand Bahama island to be precise).
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
DESYs idea of Germany...
...No change since Ocotober 1989 ;)
...does it mean something, that one of the most important german science centres never acknowledged the unicifaction?
Or are there too many "Die PARTEI" members working here ;) ?
Or are there too many "Die PARTEI" members working here ;) ?
Thursday, October 08, 2009
Is this YOUR cat???
This THE fucking best Blogpicture I have seen in years, still pissing my pants looking at it :)
Tuesday, October 06, 2009
Trying to teach at EMBL HD...
...today, I will teach some biologists how to use PERL for stupid biology tasks...
I am curious if they will understand anything...
Well, I will try to do that...but things seem to not be working properly here...the computers are not ready, my lecture was postponed for half an hour...and like 5 minutes ago, a chinese guy came into the room and asked in very broken english, whether i might be the person to help him to get a german bank account...
err...yes, i am...send all your money to my account, i will deduct 50% and put the rest on your nice new bank account ;)
The real bank guy was in the next room...poor EMBL HD ppl...they force them to get an account at the Sparkasse...couldn't they get a real bank ;) ?
I am curious if they will understand anything...
Well, I will try to do that...but things seem to not be working properly here...the computers are not ready, my lecture was postponed for half an hour...and like 5 minutes ago, a chinese guy came into the room and asked in very broken english, whether i might be the person to help him to get a german bank account...
err...yes, i am...send all your money to my account, i will deduct 50% and put the rest on your nice new bank account ;)
The real bank guy was in the next room...poor EMBL HD ppl...they force them to get an account at the Sparkasse...couldn't they get a real bank ;) ?
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Presents from France
Ahhh...was this a nice PhD retreat in shabby France...little sleep, too much sun and the perfect amount of fun ;)
Sadly, there is something not so perfect I took home with me...seems like those french bastards gave me something inferior to eat...at least my system can't work that stuff out...the toilet has become my most favorite place in the last three days...and today the doctor certified me sick for two more days...
let's hope the symbiotic relationship between me and the ceramic bowl has been discontinued until then...
...und noch was fuer die Deutschen...
Bei der ganzen Scheisserei fiel mir auf wie scheisse eigentlich der Werbspruch von diesen komischen bayrischen Moebelhaeusern mit Ottfried Fischer???
- "Die mit dem roten Stuhl" - ???
Sadly, there is something not so perfect I took home with me...seems like those french bastards gave me something inferior to eat...at least my system can't work that stuff out...the toilet has become my most favorite place in the last three days...and today the doctor certified me sick for two more days...
let's hope the symbiotic relationship between me and the ceramic bowl has been discontinued until then...
...und noch was fuer die Deutschen...
Bei der ganzen Scheisserei fiel mir auf wie scheisse eigentlich der Werbspruch von diesen komischen bayrischen Moebelhaeusern mit Ottfried Fischer???
- "Die mit dem roten Stuhl" - ???
Thursday, August 27, 2009
...neulich aufm Wertstoffhof...
Heute grade die letzten Reste aus der alten Butze weggeschmissen...war dann so mein 5. Besuch...einer Typen kam gleich auf mich zu, guckt mich und meint "ne, deinen Ausweis brauch ich nicht sehen, du bist ja eh dauernd hier..."
...komisch irgendwie...beim Baecker passiert mir das nicht...aber aufm Wertstoffhof erkennen sie mich wieder...irgendwie strange...heisst aber auch, dass ich scheinbar genug ausgemistet habe ;)
...komisch irgendwie...beim Baecker passiert mir das nicht...aber aufm Wertstoffhof erkennen sie mich wieder...irgendwie strange...heisst aber auch, dass ich scheinbar genug ausgemistet habe ;)
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Moving is done, well...soon...
As some of you guys might know, i moved in with my girlfriend recently...
almost all of it is done...well, at least all our stuff is in our new flat...but there is still some furniture missing, hence all our boxes are standing around waiting to be unpacked...
some walls still need to be painted (at least in silkes opinion ;) and shelves, wardrobes and a couch have to be bought...
but we hope in 3-4 weeks it is gonna be done...hopefully ;)
the new hood is now schwenckestrasse 4, next to osterstrasse!
almost all of it is done...well, at least all our stuff is in our new flat...but there is still some furniture missing, hence all our boxes are standing around waiting to be unpacked...
some walls still need to be painted (at least in silkes opinion ;) and shelves, wardrobes and a couch have to be bought...
but we hope in 3-4 weeks it is gonna be done...hopefully ;)
the new hood is now schwenckestrasse 4, next to osterstrasse!
Sunday, August 09, 2009
Weltuntergang
Hamburg, 31.12.2012...der Weltuntergang nimmt seinen Lauf...
Oh, stimmt ja gar nicht, issja erst August 2009, und eigentlich regnet es auch nur wie aus eimern (5000 Liter Eimern)...
War eben sehr witzig, hab Silke zum Meeting Point fuers nach Oldenburg fahren gebracht...und aufm Weg von der Wohnung ins Auto wurde es schlagartig richtig dunkel...
Als wir dann im Auto sassen am Wasser ohne Ende vom Himmel...
Was daran witzig war?
Im Auto war die Mucke auf random...und was lief??? "Die Flut" Von Witt & Heppner :)
Aufm Rueckweg vonner Autobahnauffahrt Bahrenfeld gingen dann nur noch 20-30km/h und Aquaplaning ohne Ende...witzig, aber doch strange...
...grade eben iss nochn Blitz genau hier um die Ecke eingeschlagen...
Oh, stimmt ja gar nicht, issja erst August 2009, und eigentlich regnet es auch nur wie aus eimern (5000 Liter Eimern)...
War eben sehr witzig, hab Silke zum Meeting Point fuers nach Oldenburg fahren gebracht...und aufm Weg von der Wohnung ins Auto wurde es schlagartig richtig dunkel...
Als wir dann im Auto sassen am Wasser ohne Ende vom Himmel...
Was daran witzig war?
Im Auto war die Mucke auf random...und was lief??? "Die Flut" Von Witt & Heppner :)
Aufm Rueckweg vonner Autobahnauffahrt Bahrenfeld gingen dann nur noch 20-30km/h und Aquaplaning ohne Ende...witzig, aber doch strange...
...grade eben iss nochn Blitz genau hier um die Ecke eingeschlagen...
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Der PARTEI-Film - 05.08. im Millerntorstadion
Moinsen,
Pflichttermin am 05.08!!! Der Film ueber die PARTEI (Partei für Arbeit, Rechtsstaat, Tierschutz, Elitenförderung und basisdemokratische Initiative), in der ich stolzes Mitglied bin und sogar das PARTEI-Buch immer neben meinem Bett liegen habe, feiert am Millerntor Weltpremiere!!!
Pflichttermin am 05.08!!! Der Film ueber die PARTEI (Partei für Arbeit, Rechtsstaat, Tierschutz, Elitenförderung und basisdemokratische Initiative), in der ich stolzes Mitglied bin und sogar das PARTEI-Buch immer neben meinem Bett liegen habe, feiert am Millerntor Weltpremiere!!!
Kommt alle mit und guckt diesen grossen Film mit mir ;)
Vorstellung ist am Mittwoch den 05.08. (in einer Woche) um 21:30 im Millerntorstadion im Hamburg.
Mehr Infos:
http://www.die-partei-hamburg.de/2009/07/24/der-partei-film-im-hamburger-millerntorstadion/
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